There are many things to love about winter. I am, of course, kidding. Winter is a loathsome season and anyone who claims to love it is being paid off by “Big Winter.” Follow the money!
Regardless of whether or not you are on the payroll at Winter Corp., I think we can all agree that between the pandemic and the chill, we are all feeling a bit limited.
For me personally, giving up the things I look forward to the absolute most has been eating at me. I am beyond fortunate to have remained healthy during 2020 and I try my hardest not to lose sight of what is truly important, but I’m not going to lie and say that having my big pleasure activities taken away has been easy.
I wanted to check in with my readers because it’s been a hot minute (hi, lovelies!) and pass on a little thing that has brought me joy this year, and hopefully help you out too!
We’re talking holiday gifts this week!
As the holiday season approaches, there is some pressure on the gifts we give and receive to make life at home more enjoyable. And nothing relieves pressure quite like a massage.
This massage table is a showstopper. Just seeing a wrapped present this big under the Christmas tree is exciting, and opening it up to find a massage table will be sure to get a huge reaction. For only 100 dollars, this costs the same amount as one massage. Yeah, a hell of a deal. I will also say that it makes you and your partner better able to give a quality massage.
A lot of the hassle with giving a massage is the low height of most beds and the fact that you have to climb all over a bed to get to the other side of the massagee’s (it’s a word, shut up) body. The hunching and general discomfort of performing a massage often shortens the time you are able to rub for and the quality of the rubbin’.
My partner (and editor, who has many lovely qualities, and a handsome face, many many, just very excellent parts, hi dear!), who doesn’t exactly know his way around a shoulder muscle, is able to use so much more leverage than ever before without putting stress on his own joints with this table. Also, just having my face down in that hole reminds me of being at a spa, and gets me 8 percent of the way to Relaxville without a single finger on my back.
I have had this table since April and it is sturdy and extremely comfortable. I have climbed up on it with my husband on the table and it doesn’t budge (about a 300 pound stress test… ok, ok, 315, yeeeesh). It really earns its great reviews.
Need a little additional help?
There is nothing that beats that skin-on-skin contact of a professional massage. Strong hands intuitively manipulating those little pieces of string and goo that hold us together. My regular readers know that I am essentially a golden retriever and welcome all the pats all the time. Historically I have not been a fan of cold, probing massage devices. Yeah, they promise a pleasurable good time, but there’s been only one device that has delivered on that front, if you know what I mean (it’s my remote).
That said, I have had to get creative this year because sometimes my wrists hurt. And also my elbows. And also my fingers. And I can tell when it’s about to rain because my hip starts to click and clunk. So while the table has helped immeasurably in taking off the joint pressure when I am giving a massage, I admit that I sometimes whip out a little helper.
Here are my top picks for massage tools:
I like this one because it’s multi-directional and you can use it on yourself as well as your partner. This gives you a little extra reach on yourself, and a partner can use it to get more deeply into that gnarly tissue.
Is it a ray gun? Is it a drill? Is it a prop from a torture scene in a sci-fi movie based in outer space?
Nope, it’s just a very extreme and extremely weird massage tool. It sort of… um… pummels you, but in a good way! This oddity costs more than the massage table itself (which really says something about how affordable the table is), but I and thousands of hardcore stimulation enthusiasts agree that this violent contraption is the bees knees.
What are you gifting this year for this quite unusual Christmas season? Let us know in the comments below!
I hope that you all have a safe and happy holiday! Merry Christmas!